Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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