found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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