im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
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