so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
