you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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