It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Randomize
