question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
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What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
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This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs