never play flip cup with pint glasses
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Randomize
