If i come over, it means nothing
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
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