i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
