Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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