these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
