I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
