stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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