We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
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Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
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