I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
