i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
