Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
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