Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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