He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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