my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize