I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
