Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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