JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm passing your future prison.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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