franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
