Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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