I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
from now on my penis is your penis
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Randomize
