I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Cover your peen. We're going out.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
