talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
