Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize