been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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