Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize