My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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