i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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