He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
More tranny stories later!
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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