I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
