There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
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I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
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I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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