I could have mohawked her pubes.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
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