We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
The best revenge is premature balding
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
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