I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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