Duck Duck Cougar?
Only a mothe r could love this liver
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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