on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
