First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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