I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
third nipple confirmed
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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