A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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