i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
