Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Randomize
