ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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