I think i sorta joined a cult last night
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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