Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.

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  (603): I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight. http://tfl.nu/a6u7
  Replies (17) Good night (2685) Bad night (495) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.

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  (910): so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch. http://tfl.nu/syjm
  Replies (57) Good night (16784) Bad night (1008)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom

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  (410): I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom http://tfl.nu/r4rn
  Replies (67) Good night (634) Bad night (6030) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.

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  (901): Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore. http://tfl.nu/ntw9
  Replies (55) Good night (5398) Bad night (1222) Order T-Shirt
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  (831): View more from California

  she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.

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  (831): she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it. http://tfl.nu/5c70
  Replies (16) Good night (4544) Bad night (1023) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there

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  (623): Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there http://tfl.nu/vurv
  Replies (8) Good night (2304) Bad night (855) Order T-Shirt
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  (661): View more from California

  I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile

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  (661): I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile http://tfl.nu/m5ed
  Replies (8) Good night (1047) Bad night (1419) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.

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  (206): I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day. http://tfl.nu/m69g
  Replies (10) Good night (3426) Bad night (849)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.

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  (443): Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion. http://tfl.nu/xb4s
  Replies (7) Good night (1024) Bad night (2349)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.

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  (303): So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay. http://tfl.nu/vqqs
  Replies (8) Good night (1635) Bad night (518)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Come down off the roof.

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  (847): Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go. (314): Come down off the roof. http://tfl.nu/d3mp
  Replies (3) Good night (1854) Bad night (559)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.

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  (563): i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look. http://tfl.nu/aj1z
  Replies (9) Good night (627) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.

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  (206): I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent. http://tfl.nu/cy1a
  Replies (6) Good night (770) Bad night (367) Order T-Shirt
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.

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  (864): Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you. http://tfl.nu/kfw2
  Replies (2) Good night (633) Bad night (248) Order T-Shirt
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.

  (1-270): View more from Kentucky

  Hey I found a cat!

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  (270): Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do. (1-270): Hey I found a cat! http://tfl.nu/yvuv
  Replies (7) Good night (1506) Bad night (164) Order T-Shirt

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